Deleting Is Not An Option
by StrawberryDream15
Summary: The chills kept crawling down his spine. His head throbbed furiously and his skin was as pale as a ghost. Maybe it was because of shock, or realization. Either way, only four little words had caused his soul to freeze over.
1. Revealing the Wound

**Me: Happy White Day to everyone! Hope you get awesome presents! :) Sadly, I'm starting to write a tragedy on such a joyful date! I know it's crazy, but... I just had to publish this. Sorry...**

**Vanilla: Hana-chan doesn't own Yumeiro Pâtissière!**

****Me: NOTE - I couldn't figure out how to incorporate the Sweets Spirits into this story, so they won't make any appearances in this one...****

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><p><span>Chapter 1: Revealing the Wound<span>

"Ugh, spring cleaning sure sucks..." Kashino Makoto muttered to himself as he sorted some papers into huge piles. Digging through his drawers, he pulled out many files, assorted in age.

"What? Sketchbook #5?" He fingered a bounded book and started flipping through it, staring at the drawings etched into the pages. "Whoa, this was from my middle school days!"

He studied his plans for the Cake Grand Prix and some sketches of cakes. "I should finish that someday," he told himself as his gaze fell upon a half-completed sketch of an intricate chocolate sculpture design.

One page was a bit loose and jutted outwards, almost desiring for Kashino to flip to it. Curious, he turned to it and glanced at the drawing before him. Suddenly, his heart stopped and his mind started reeling.

_"Sweets are meant to be eaten with the people you love, you know?"_

_"Hey, don't force yourself. We are your friends, so let us help you. You shouldn't have to face everything all on your own."_

_"You can do it, Kashino! I believe in you!"_

The blond gasped as memories flooded his brain. Trembling, he slammed the sketchbook shut and flung it across the room. It hit the wall with a loud 'thump'. "Argh, she... She... That face haunts my dreams... I want all thoughts of her out of my life!" he spat, face pale.

Kashino was now panting hard, clutching his throbbing head. "Why do I keep thinking of her? Why do I remember these things?"

**~Flashback~**

_"H-here..."_

_"For me? Oh, thank you, Makoto! It's so cute!"_

_"That charm reminds me of you - my sweet and beautiful, little strawberry."_

_"M-Makoto... I love you so much!" She leaned in for a kiss._

_"I do too, Ichigo. I do too." He gently pressed his lips against hers, breathing in the scent of her._

_"Makoto... I want to stay like this forever..."_

_"Exactly how I feel too," Kashino grinned before kissing her again.  
><em>

**~Flashback 2~**

_"My parents... They are still always nagging me about becoming a doctor. It's just so... annoying!"_

_"They still don't realize that you're serious about your dream?"_

_"No! After all these years, they still don't get it! Argh, it frustrates me so much!"_

_"Just continue to pursue your dream, Makoto," Ichigo squeezed his hands with hers. "Although the struggles seem tremendous, never give up when it comes to your future will. You'll definitely be very successful, I'm positive!"_

_"Ichigo..." Kashino murmured, "You're so encouraging, thank you... I love you so much..."_

_She giggled. "Always?"_

_"Always."_

**~End of Flashbacks~**

"I-it never turned out like that..." Kashino gritted his teeth. "There was really a time when we loved each other? It seems like such a distant memory..."

To put his mind off of her, he continued to rummage through his drawers. Distractions were totally needed at the moment. Minutes later, his hands felt something out of place.

"Huh? What's this?" Kashino pulled out a regular, unopened envelope. He stared at the heading:

**_To: Kashino Makoto_**

**_From: Amano Ichigo_**

_Oh..._ Just the sight of her name made Kashino's surroundings turn upside-down. _I-I can't look any longer.._. He set the envelope face-down onto the ground as events of his past rushed into his head.

**~Flashback~**

_"That's it. I'm sick and tired of you! I am leaving once and for all!" Kashino stormed out of the condo._

_"J-just do whatever you want, baka!" Ichigo called after him, trembling as she stood on the porch. "You can go far away for all I care!"_

_"Hmph! I'm packing once I come back," he muttered to himself. He angrily jumped into his car and drove off, leaving a crushed Ichigo gazing after him._

**~Flashback: Time Lapse~**

_"Currently boarding, Boeing 747. Will all passengers of this plane please come to Gate A4 immediately."_

_Kashino sighed and stood from his seat, gathering his things. It was really late into the night, and he was getting tired. _As soon as I board that plane, I'll catch a few winks-

_"KASHINO!" A voice called from behind._

_The blond turned in surprise to see the familiar brunette struggling to get free from the clutch of two security guards._

_"Ma'am, if you're not flying, please leave immediately," one told her._

_"B-but I have to see someone off!" she wailed, kicking the men fiercely._

_Kashino ran up to her, expression cold and emotionless. "What are you doing here? Go back home."_

_"Here!" She thrust an envelope at him, still squirming in the guards' grips. "Read it when you board the plane!"_

_Kashino didn't even look at it before flinging it back to her. "I don't want it," he replied icily, heading to the boarding gate with his luggage._

_"W-WAIT!" She screamed, still resisting the officers. However, Kashino only gave her a mere wave over the shoulder without turning back._

**~Flashback: Time Lapse 2~**

_Kashino reached into his mailbox, pulling out its contents._

Junk mail, ads, bills..._ He flipped through the stack of paper. At the bottom, there was a white envelope. Kashino only had to glance at it for one second before feeling a chill run down his spine._

_It was sent from Amano Ichigo._

It's the same letter from that night at the airport_, he realized. _How did she know my address? She must have asked someone else..._ He closed the mailbox lid and headed back into his apartment, plopping the mail on the table. Still holding the envelope, he wondered, _What am I supposed to do with it?_ He didn't want to read it, since it just didn't... seem right._

I might as well throw it away, then..._ Kashino started towards the trash can in the corner. However, he was about to get rid of it when something in his brain sparked. Somehow, he didn't want to throw the envelope away because of how much meaning there was within it. If Ichigo had tried so hard to get the letter to him, then wasn't it pretty important seeming?_

_But then again, he didn't feel like reading it yet. _Maybe some other time, when I'm ready..._ He then picked it up and stuffed it into the depths of his drawer, hoping to never have to read it anytime soon._

**~End of Flashbacks~**

"That's right... It's that letter from the time when..." Kashino trailed off, collecting his memories. "It's all coming back now..."

He held the envelope in his hands, running a finger over the letters of Ichigo's name. _Should I...?_ Taking a deep breath, he tore open the seal and reached in.

There was only a piece of paper that seemed like it had been ripped from a small notebook. Kashino unfolded it, slowly, bracing himself for what was to appear on the page. Glancing at the words, written in Ichigo's bubbly handwriting, he felt his heart stop. Time froze, and an unpleasant feeling swept through him.

_This... This can't be true_, he thought.

For on the paper, written in black ink, was just one simple sentence:

**_Kashino, I have cancer._**

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><p><strong>Me: Well, how was it? First cliffhanger of the story! This is my first tragic tale, so... It might not be good... ^^" And it might have been a bit confusing and too short...<strong>

**Chocolat: Please, everyone! Comfort Hana by reviewing! She's awfully disappointed with her 'Photo Booth' story...**

**Me: Yeah, no one seems to like it! D: I'll never delete it, but still... Is it the topic? Is something wrong with my writing? Please, peoples! Tell me! T.T I lack self-confidence!**

**Chocolat: Hope you liked the story so far! Please review! :D**


	2. This Is No Illusion

**Me: Hi! I hope I'm not too late with this update...**

**Kashino: You are.**

**Me: Be quiet. Anyway, let's get to the story!**

**Kashino: Hana doesn't own Yumeiro- Wait, what's the point of continuing this?**

**Me: ...I don't know. It's just part of the routine.**

**Kashino: ...**

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><p><span>Chapter 2: This Is No Illusion<span>

His thoughts swam, crashing into one another as he stared at the letter before him. Hands trembling, he read the line over and over again, still not believing what it said.

_Ichigo has cancer...?_

Kashino shuddered as an ominous feeling swept through his torso. _N-no!_ He tore the paper in two before crinkling it up into a ball and tossing it into the wastebasket.

_She... can't..._ The blond chewed on his lip nervously. Suddenly, a thought struck him.

Ichigo had sent that letter to him 5 years ago.

So that meant... she had been diagnosed for quite some time. Kashino turned pale as something inside him sparked.

_Why am I feeling so concerned about this? She's not part of my life anymore. But why... Why does the image of her pop inside my head each day? And how come my heart felt so pained when I read that sentence?_ Kashino stood there, utterly confused.

_Why am I so worried about her? I don't love her anymore... right...?_ His eyes traveled back to the shreds lying in the trash bin. _Ichigo... Is she ok?_

_I don't know why, but this whole thing is bothering me. I just have to see her in perfect condition..._ Kashino's eyes suddenly became motionless, his gaze transfixed on nothing in particular. _Ichigo..._ As if in a trance, he stood up. _I..._

Involuntarily, he ran to his bedroom and packed a duffel bag with clothes and toiletries. After stuffing it with food and water too, he unconsciously grabbed his keys and headed out the door, shutting it behind him.

_I'm coming, Ichigo._

Kashino's legs carried him to the nearest bullet train station. It seemed like he was floating; his motions were swift. As he purchased a ticket, his soul was oblivious to the world surrounding him. His thoughts were only focused on one subject:

Ichigo.

_Wait for me, ok?_ As Kashino waited for his ride, he prayed that Ichigo would be easy to locate. _Please, Kami-sama. Let me see her again._

_Th-this heavy burden lying in my chest... The fact that she's still in my heart but I can't see her everyday - it kills me._ The train came from the right side and screeched to a halt. Kashino stepped onto the bullet train as soon as the doors parted for incoming passengers. _She is on my mind every day, and yet..._

The train closed its doors automatically and lurched forward, starting its journey towards the next stop.

_Ichigo... I still have feelings for you, don't I?_

Kashino breathed unsteadily, trying to control the pain he felt as he thought about the past...

**-Flashback~**

_"Are we there yet?"_

_"Almost, Ichigo... Here we are!" Kashino untied the blindfold that had been slipped over Ichigo's eyes._

_As soon as the cloth was removed, Ichigo gazed at the scene before her in delight. Her face immediately lit up with joy. "M-Makoto... It's beautiful..."_

_"Nice, huh? I picked it out just for us." Kashino grinned at the brunette._

_"Thank you so much!" Ichigo hugged him tightly before eagerly taking off towards their new condo. "Come on!"_

_Kashino chuckled softly to himself before following his girlfriend. _That girl is the same as always...

_He walked into the tiny house and witnessed the ditzy Ichigo running up and down the stairs and through the small halls. Sweat dropping, he called, "I-Ichigo..."_

_"Oh! Sorry!" The girl stopped in her tracks and laughed sheepishly._

_"I know you're excited, but you shouldn't ruin the house so fast," Kashino smirked._

_Ichigo pouted and crossed her arms. "Well..."_

_The blond cocked his head and took her hand. "Come on, there is another surprise over here."_

_He led the girl to a huge kitchen in one section of the condo. Gleaming cooking utensils lined the racks and sparkled in the lights. Ichigo gasped with awe and spun around, not breathing, taking in the glorious sight._

_"You... bought all of this?" Ichigo turned to Kashino, mouth still agape. _

_He grinned and nodded silently in response. _

_"W-wow..." Ichigo stared at the professional tools that dotted the counters. She peeked in the oven and the baumkuchen machine. After studying the gelato maker in the corner, it was then when she started to squeal and hop up and down in a hyper manner. _

_"Thank you, Makoto! Thank you so much!" Ichigo jumped the blond and brought him to the floor. "Oops... Sorry..."_

_"Heh, it's nothing." Kashino rubbed his sore back and stood up. "Well, what do you think?"_

_"I'm loving this already!" Ichigo twirled around in her skirt. "I can't believe we'll be able to make sweets in here everyday-"_

_"Just the two of us, forever," Kashino added._

_A soft, pink color started to form on the brunette's cheeks. "H-huh?"_

_"We'll be living like dormmates. But once we're finished with college, we will take good care of this condo -together."_

_Ichigo blushed even more. "Hey, we've still got a while before..."_

_"I know, I was just saying..." Kashino smiled wryly at her._

_"And you're one year ahead of me," Ichigo reminded him._

_"You know that I'll wait for you!" Kashino remarked._

_"Don't get ahead of yourself, Makoto."_

_"I won't," he replied. But deep inside, he'd already planned out the details of their little shop they were going to own later on. _I love her dearly, and I want the best for her. So... I can't just put the future off my mind!

_"Well... How will we pay for this house? I mean... It looks rather expensive..." Ichigo gazed at the glistening floor below her feet._

_"I've thought about that, and I think we should pay for the bills together. We could each use our monthly income to pay for half of the total money needed. Are you ok about that?"_

_"It seems reasonable to do so. I mean, it's only fair that way." Ichigo smiled._

_The brunette looked irresistibly cute in the blond's eyes. The grin of hers was priceless, and his heart overflowed with pure happiness. "Hey, I have one more surprise for you, Ichigo."_

_The brunette's eyes widened in shock as the male gently grasped her hand and led her to the dining room. "Th-this wasn't all?"  
><em>

_"Not even close," Kashino beamed. He guided her to a seat at the table. "Wait here." He was gone in an instant._

_Ichigo waited patiently, fiddling with her thumbs. She suddenly heard a clinking noise and looked up. Kashino stood before her with a whole meal in his arms._

_"Pot-au-feu!" Ichigo screamed in bliss as he set a bowl of steaming food before her. Kashino also laid a wineglass next to it and started to fill it up with champagne. He did the same for his own meal and sat down across from the female._

_"Makoto... You never fail to amaze me," Ichigo giggled._

_"I'm glad. Wait until dessert time," he winked._

_Ichigo's eyes danced energetically as the thought of confections rushed into her mind. However, her gaze rested on the wine glasses. "Makoto...?"_

_Kashino flashed a huge smile. "Thought I forgot, huh? Well, I didn't." He held up his glass and proclaimed, "Cheers to our dating anniversary!"_

_Ichigo gasped. _He... remembered!_ She picked up her glass also and clinked it against the side of Kashino's. "Cheers!" she replied. _

_Setting the drink down after a sip, Ichigo pursed her lips together in thought. "How long has it been already? Three or four years?"_

_"It doesn't matter," Kashino gazed deep into the brunette's eyes. Leaning forward over the table, he kissed her tenderly. "Just as long as we're together."_

_"Mmm... I love you, Makoto," Ichigo murmured._

_"And I love you also, Ichigo."_

**~End of Flashback~**

Kashino gazed out the window at the country scenery, body shaking with hurt. "I remember it like it was yesterday," he mumbled, a lump growing in his throat. "We had so much fun..."

He closed his eyes and sighed. The house had been a beautiful one. It was also conveniently built in a city fifteen minutes away from the Japanese Branch of St. Marie College, where Kashino had been currently attending and Ichigo would a year later. After several years of sharing the condo with Ichigo, he'd gotten angry and flown to Paris. The city of France was just a trick for Ichigo, however. After arriving in Paris, Kashino immediately flew back to Japan, but getting off at an airport in Sendai instead. If she tried to track him down and follow him, she'd end up at the wrong place.

_I left her... I'd graduated college already and it was her last year, but I took advantage of her condition and just ran off..._ Kashino felt a pang of guilt stab his heart.

As the train slowed to a stop, Kashino stood up from his seat. _But why... Why did I leave her?_

~x~

_Huff, huff..._ Kashino panted hard as he finally reached the old condo, the one Ichigo and he had stayed in for three years. It still looked occupied, much to his relief.

He went up to the doorbell and started to ring it, but to no avail. _Is she not home or something? Oh, well._ He decided to turn around and head for home. _I came all the way here for nothing? What am I doing anyway? Suddenly taking a trip to another city..._

Sighing heavily, he took a few steps back from the door before he heard a voice behind him boom, "Oi, why are you on my property?"

Kashino swung around to see a tall man with a huge briefcase glare at him.

"Ah, I'm sorry. Do you live here?" Kashino asked.

"Yes, I do. Now if you'd please excuse me-"

"Oh, just a minute, please, sir. Do you know where the last owner of this condo went?"

The man rubbed his chin thoughtfully, not able to remember the previous person who lived in his current house. "No, but I have bought this condo for about seven months already. Sorry."

Kashino's heart nearly stopped. Then... Where is Ichigo now? "I need to see if she's still living in this city."

"I'd suggest you talk to close relatives of hers, then."

"I guess so... " Kashino turned to leave after saying, "Thank you, kind mister." He briskly ran back to the train station.

The blond decided to go to the Amano household. _I'll ask her family where she went..._ He rode another bullet train to the Nijigaoka station. Praying the whole way, he never refrained from keeping Ichigo on the front of his mind.

Kashino stepped off the train as soon as the doors opened and immediately rushed in the direction of the Amano household. _Please, please, please..._

He rang the doorbell anxiously, wanting to see Ichigo as soon as possible. However, only her father opened the door.

"Oh, how nice it is to see you again, Kashino-kun." The man shook hands with the younger.

"Same," Kashino replied. "Um... Is Ichigo here?"

Amano Shigeru's face suddenly went pale. Eyes downcast, he frowned and responded darkly, "What are you talking about? Ichigo is dead."

A cold wind swept through Kashino's heart. "Dead? What? No! What are you saying?"

The man sighed. "You didn't know? She has been dead for a long time now, actually."

"WHAT?" Kashino's voice trembled in disbelief. "I-I don't believe you." _What her father said was a lie. It just has to be. There's absolutely no way that she could be dead... right?_

"Come on, I'll show you." Ichigo's father took the male by the hand and dragged him out the door. They walked in silence as he led Kashino through the misty fog. _Where is he taking me? This is all happening too fast..._

"Here we are," Amano Shigeru stated, voice a bit husky. "Right there, in front of you." Kashino looked up to see a grayish material.

As the fog cleared a bit, Kashino could make out the tombstone and its engraved words:

**_Amano Ichigo_**

**_January 5, 19xx - September 16, 20xx_**

**_A loving daughter, friend, and pâtissière_**

**_In memory of her, the dreamer_**

_No... NO..._

It was then when the rain began to fall.

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><p><strong>Me: Ok, guys. PLEASE DON'T KILL ME OR CURSE AT ME OR WHATEVER! PLEASE! D:<strong>

**Ichigo: B-but... You KILLED me! T.T**

**Me: I'm so sorry for doing that! Everyone, please forgive me! It just goes with the flow of the story...**

**Kashino: Unforgivable, Hana. Just utterly unforgivable...**

**Hanabusa: We'll never speak to you ever again.**

**Andou: Agreed.**

**Me: WAAH! The Sweets Princes hate me now!**

**Ichigo: Serves you right for killing me.**

**Me: Now Ichigo's getting mean... T^T But I guess it's what I deserve.**

**Thanks to all who reviewed chapter one! You guys are the best! Virtual hugs~! :3**

**1.) xXRoyal Mai and Miki HimeXx**

**2.) Mikashimotaku**

**3.) Miyu Kozuki**

**4.) InTheDark363**

**5.) Toroiko**

**Also thanks to the subscribers and favorite story additions! I gladly appreciate everything! :D**

**Now... Please review! I know that it's horrible of me to kill off a character, but... note that this story is a TRAGEDY. So please, no criticism about what I did! I beg of you! I know it's cruel... I'm such a horrible person. T.T**


	3. Undoing Is Impossible

**Me: I'm back with another chapter! And... The three guys still hate me... T^T**

**Hanabusa: Why, of course! You shouldn't treat such a beautiful girl like that!**

**Andou: She's very precious to us, Hana!**

**Kashino: And she's my girlfriend! D:**

**Me: I KNOW! Jeez, she's only dead in the story! **

**Ichigo: Yeah, stop talking like I'm seriously gone, guys! I'm still here, you know!**

**Sweets Princes: Sorry...**

****Me: Anyway, on with the story! :D****

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><p><span>Chapter 3: Undoing Is Impossible<span>

Slowly, the rain fell from the sky, dripping on everything below. Drops of water slid down Kashino's hair and face, also soaking the fabric of his jacket. The blond's expression was sober and stone-like; his eyes were hollow and showed no life within them. He was silent and unable to speak.

"Kashino-kun?" Amano Shigeru glanced at the boy worriedly.

"I-I..." Kashino's pupils started to tremble uncontrollably. He stared at the tombstone gravely, face terribly pale. _Ichigo... You're not dead... You just can't be!_

"This must be too sudden. I'm sorry." The older man patted Kashino gently on the shoulder, trying to give him comfort.

"L-lie... This is all a mere lie..." Kashino whispered harshly, glaring menacingly at the grave. "She's not dead; this is all some stupid joke!"

"She's dead, Kashi-"

"No, she isn't! You're lying!"

"Ichigo's DEAD!" The father of the late pâtissière grabbed Kashino fiercely by the shoulders and shook him hard. "She's dead, okay? My daughter... Your girl... She's gone..." He fell to the ground and broke down in painful sobs.

Kashino bit his lip so forcefully, it started to bleed. _She's not dead, she's not dead_, he told himself. However, he knew she was, deep down inside his heart. _And it's all my fault..._

The chocolatier swallowed a lump that was growing in his throat and wailed, "I'm sorry."

The man took his hands off his face, looking up from his kneeling position. "F-for what?"

"For everything..." Kashino closed his eyes as a burden stabbed at his heart. "Everything I did."

**~Flashback~**

_"You're so careless, wasting our money like that," Kashino shouted, throwing his hands up in frustration._

_"Buying sweets is not wasting money," she retorted. "Who's the one who insisted we stay in such a magnificent house, huh?"_

_"You were the person who said that she was dreaming of owning a pâtisserie one day! And this house has a garden and an abundant kitchen," he hissed angrily. "I just wanted to make you happy-"_

_"Well, you're not, just look at you! You're yelling at me like it's all my fault!"_

_"It IS your fault!" His voice boomed, causing Ichigo to recoil in terror. _

_Shattered, she stared at the ground, fists clenched and shaking at her sides. "You... You're despicable."_

_"I'm fine with your image of me," Kashino whispered harshly, eyes turning into slits. Furious rage building up inside of him, he shot back, "I thought you were the one who saw good in everything?"_

_Ichigo gazed up at him, shocked, tears staining her eyes. "What?"_

_"You're supposed to be always cheerful and energetic, never putting conflict between you and another," Kashino stated coldly._

_Silent tears slid down Ichigo's cheeks. "H-how dare you say such a thing... Don't expect me to be like that at all times!" She trembled with hurt and anger._

_"What happened to the girl I fell in love with, the one who shared happiness with everyone?" Kashino scoffed. "I want her back."_

_"And what happened with the guy who was kind and caring on the inside, who acted so sweet to the ones he loved?" Ichigo sobbed._

_Kashino pursed his lips, not looking at the brunette. "You know what? That high-pitched voice of yours is so annoying; stop talking."_

_Ichigo's mouth fell open in utter disbelief and fury. "Well, excuse me!"_

_"Actually, everything about you is annoying," Kashino spat. "You're a fat cake pig."_

_"You... You blunt sadist!" Ichigo shouted back._

_"Pushy glutton!"_

_"Cold-hearted beast!"_

_"Conceited snob!" As soon as those words rolled off Kashino's tongue, Ichigo stared into his pupils with a pained expression. _

_Then, suddenly, she glared at the blond with hatred written on her face. "Heartless ogre."_

_That did it. Kashino couldn't take it anymore; the pain pierced him like a gleaming sword. "That's it. I'm sick and tired of you! I am leaving once and for all!" He raced out of the house, thoughts swirling. _We're finished, Ichigo.

**~End of Flashback~**

The words he had said gnawed at his insides. _I don't even remember how the fight started... Or why it had been so significant._ He continued to stare aimlessly at the wet grass as his memories took over his brain. "What kind of cancer was it?" he asked quietly.

"Lung cancer," Amano Shigeru replied. "It came suddenly; she must have been exposed to secondhand smoke or something."

"The lungs, huh?" Kashino pondered over the fact. "Come to think of it..."

**~Flashback~**

_"Ichigo! Come on, you slowpoke! This distance isn't too far for you to run!"_

_"M-Makoto... You're still such a meanie," Ichigo groaned as she breathed heavily. "I honestly can't go on!"_

_"Hurry!" Kashino scowled._

_"I-I..." Suddenly, Ichigo collapsed. Horrified, Kashino frantically ran to the worn out brunette._

_"Ichigo! Are you alright?" His pupils shook with worry._

_The female opened her eyes and stared up at the blond, croaking, "M-my lungs... They burn..."_

_"They shouldn't. We haven't even run that much," Kashino remarked._

_"Well, I have asthma." Ichigo slowly sat up on the rocky pavement._

_"WHAT? Why didn't you tell me earlier?" Kashino's voice was filled with shock. "I shouldn't have pushed you, I'm so sorry..."_

_"It's okay. I want to keep running and get in shape. And it's fun to do it by your side," Ichigo smiled in response._

**~End of Flashback~**

"She was going to tell you about her condition sooner, but it seemed like you two weren't on good terms at the time..." The man ran a hand through his brown hair.

"Oh... I'm such a terrible person. I shouldn't have fought with her, or left her. If I'd listened to what she had intended to tell me, it could've changed everything..." Kashino felt huge pangs of regret within his being.

"No, it wouldn't have changed her dying," the older male told him. "The cancer was fatal, and you could've done nothing about it. Not even medical help."

"It's not that!" Kashino turned to face the other man. "It's the fact that I wasn't by her side to encourage her to fight the battle strongly. It's the fact that I never apologized and made up with her; I never got to say... g-goodbye. I could have changed those things if I hadn't been so selfish."

"Well, boy... It's too late now. We can't do anything about the past..."

"You're right. It's too late..." Kashino was enveloped by severe pain and sadness. "It's too late..."

The father stood up from the ground and patted Kashino's back. "You can still change the future, you know."

"I... I don't care about the future anymore. Ichigo - she WAS my future!"

The man paused slightly. "...I'll leave you alone now, so you can think everything through," the man said softly to Kashino before walking away towards the cemetery entrance. "Until next time."

Kashino said nothing as he faced the grave in silence. The rain was now pouring hard, and a harsh wind whipped through the trees surrounding him. However, the blond was unaffected by his surroundings.

He squatted down in front of the tombstone and ran a finger over the carved letters of Ichigo's name. His heartbeat was monotonous and his soul felt dead.

"Ichigo..." he whispered. Memories of making sweets with her flooded his brain. At school, Paris, and their condo; he recalled all the times and places.

"My Ichigo..." He remembered all the joyful moments they had shared together - all alone, just the two of them. Tears started to well up inside of him.

"My cute, little... strawberry..." After the bright, cheerful grin of Ichigo's flashed in Kashino's mind, he immediately fell to his knees. Ominous thunder boomed far away as a river of cold tears began to stream down the blond's face, not ceasing in its flow. He grasped the tombstone shakily, body heaving with ferocious sobs.

"Ichigo... Why did you have to die? I-I'm so sorry..." Kashino buried his face into his hands and wept nonstop. "I didn't deserve someone like you... I shouldn't have left you! But I can never change what I did!"

He gazed up at the dark clouds in the sky, glistening tears rolling down his cheeks. "K-Kami-sama... Why? Why did this have to happen?"

The thunder roared deafeningly in response.

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><p><strong>Kashino: Hana... Why does it seem like I'm always the one to suffer in your stories?<strong>

**Me: Hey, I made Ichigo accidentally send you that text! And you have no idea how amusing it is to torture you. Be prepared for my future fanfics! :3**

**Kashino: ...You infuriate me so much.**

**Ichigo: Kashino, at least she didn't make you die!**

**Me: RIGHT! Truthfully said, Ichigo!**

**Kashino: I have this horrible premonition, though...**

**Thanks to the reviewers of the last chapter! I'm grateful to you all! ^.^**

**1.) xXRoyal Mai and Miki HimeXx - PM**

**2.) Mikashimotaku - PM**

**3.) Princess Ageha - Sadly, as you can see, it really is true that Ichigo died. I hate to kill such a wonderful person, but my plot would be a bit strange if the character death was reversed. I love Ichigo, and I will most likely never write a story like this again... Unless my ideas get the better of me. Anyway, thanks for reviewing! :)**

**4.) Baka-bAkA Hui - PM**

**5.) teddybearcookies X3 - PM**

**Well, the next chapter is the last one! Yup, this isn't the end! I'll probably update faster than usual because of spring break. :)**

**Until we meet again~! Please review, too!**


	4. Deleting Is Not An Option

**Me: The final chapter is here! Enjoy! :D**

****Vanilla: Hana-chan doesn't own this series!****

****Me: Oh, and this chapter is just practically an epilogue, sort of. I don't know. It's mainly just a whole bunch of thought-spilling by Kashino. ...And it's a bit short, but whatever.  
><strong>**

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><p><span>Chapter 4: Deleting Is Not An Option<span>

_He gazed up at the dark clouds in the sky, glistening tears rolling down his cheeks. "K-Kami-sama... Why? Why did this have to happen?"_

_The thunder roared deafeningly in response._

~x~

Kashino held the batch of flowers closer to his chest. They were a beautiful shade of pink, which had been Ichigo's favorite color.

He continued down the road from the train station towards the cemetery. People nearby stared at him, and the girls started to squeal happily as they noticed his looks. A group of them ran up to the blond and attempted to get his attention.

"Hey, would you like to hang out with us?" they asked cheerfully. The girls wore their best smiles and twirled their volumous hair flirtatiously.

Kashino simply gave them a teeny smile and replied, "I'm sorry, but I already have a girl."

The disappointed crowd hung their heads in defeat and walked away.

Kashino briskly headed for the gate, which was just a block down. When he reached it, he creaked it open and started in. _Yes, I already do have a girl. She's..._

He stopped at Ichigo's grave in silence. Slowly, he set the flowers beside her tombstone.

"Ichigo... It's already been a year, huh? A year since that day I first came..." Kashino knelt down in front of the grave.

He stared at the engraved words in the stone and traced over them with a finger. "A loving daughter, friend, and pâtissière... Yes, she was..."

The blond raised his head and looked into the sky. "...And still is - up there in heaven."

Kashino set his gaze back onto the tombstone. "In memory of her, the dreamer," he whispered. _She really was a creative girl..._

"Ichigo... If only you were still here, your dream would have come true, I'm sure of it! If only I hadn't left you and had spent every last minute with you instead... If only... If only I hadn't been so stupid!" Kashino squeezed his eyes tightly shut as he supposedly spoke to Ichigo's spirit.

"You could have done so much more... You could have inspired so many more people and changed lots of lives! We could have had a great future with each other, but..." A huge pain stabbed at Kashino's heart. "None of that can happen anymore."

"I've said this so many times already, but... I'm sorry. For all the horrible words I said to you, for the actions that hurt you." The blond felt a wave of regret pass through him. "I can never change the errors of my past, but I will strive to be a better person each day onwards. In honor of you."

Kashino was now pouring out his true feelings while staring hard at Ichigo's grave.

"You were a one-of-a-kind girl, and you still are. Showing so much compassion to others and never giving up... You inspired me a lot, you know that? I can honestly never make sweets exactly like yours. I may have the skill, but my heart isn't as big. My techniques can never compare to the love you put into your work." He choked on the words as images of the sweet-making brunette popped into his mind.

"I-I really loved you! You were the most important person in my life, and I owe you so much... I could never love another!" Kashino was now fighting back tears. His voice quivered and his body shook with emotion.

"I... I miss you a lot, Ichigo! So much... But you're gone! The love of my life - she's dead!" The tears began to spill out, sliding down his cheeks rapidly. He was now practically shouting as he looked up into the sky.

"Kami-sama! I still don't understand why she had to die! It should have been me - not her! Why?" Kashino's lips trembled uncontrollably.

He shifted his gaze from above back to the grave. Dropping to his knees, he furiously wiped the tears away and swallowed down sobs. _Don't cry, Makoto. Don't cry. You didn't come here to weep!_

After he calmed down a bit, he continued, "I-Ichigo... I know that I should move on, but... I don't want to. It just seems wrong to do so..." Kashino exhaled unsteadily. "Y-you are the one I love, and I am not willing to let go of you so fast. In truth, I may never see another girl the same way I see you."

He managed a small smile. "You may be gone, but I still love you."

A light breeze flew by, and the sky was bright and clear. Kashino smiled to himself as he gazed at the endless stretch of blue.

"I... I see you up there in heaven, making sweets happily with your precious obaa-chan. And knowing that you're satisfied gives me happiness."

His grin widened as he pictured Ichigo smiling gently down upon him, gesturing that everything was alright.

"That's a true Angel's Smile - Sourire de l'Ange."

The blond turned towards the grave once more. "It still hurts a lot, but..." A burst of hope sprouted within him and a genuine smile adorned his face. "I think I can go on; just knowing that you're watching over me each day is enough for me."

~x~

_I can live on with my life, going about my usual tasks. However, I'll never forget that soothing smile of hers, the one that appears in my dreams every now and then. I'll always remember that high-pitched, bubbly voice of hers. But most of all, those priceless memories I shared with her, those captured moments, are forever planted in my brain. For I do not have a delete button within my mind._

"I'll never forget you, Ichigo. Ever. You're in my heart - always."

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><p><strong>Me: Well, it's the end...<strong>

**Ichigo: And I'm alive again! :D**

**Kashino: Are you going to kill another one of us next, Hana?**

**Me: No! I absolutely won't! At least for a while... I've had enough with such a depressing topic. But I will publish even more Yumeiro Pâtissière fanfics, though! :)**

**Kashino: ...And may I ask what they will be about?**

**Me: Um, I'll update 'Photo Booth' first, but for the next one, I will leave that up to the readers. ^^**

**Everyone! I want to see which story idea is more appealing, so please let me know which of the two you want me to work on next. :3**

**Choice 1: Exams (Multi-chap)**

It's that time of the year again - exams are taking place for a week. But Ichigo notices that the usually sadistic blond isn't acting like his normal self...

**Choice 2: Acne (One-shot? Maybe multi-chap)**

Hanabusa is about to face his worst nightmare yet. xD

**Well, please either PM me or review! I need to know! Thanks! :D**

**Special Thanks:**

**1.) xXRoyal Mai and Miki HimeXx - PM**

**2.) Princess Ageha - Thanks for reviewing once again! Yeah, I decided to end this story on an 'okay' note instead of on a depressing one. Leaving a feeling of hope for the future felt needed, so I did it! I hope the ending was alright! Well, I'm glad you liked it and I hope this chap was okay for you, too! :D**

**3.) MusicalAnimeFreak - PM**

**4.) Anna-Chan Cupcakes - PM**

**5.) teddybearcookies X3 - PM**

**6.) Mikashimotaku - PM**

**7.) Fate Kashigo - PM**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed this story so far, especially the people who did so for every chapter. I also appreciate the subscribers! You guys motivate me to keep going, arigatō! I love you all so much! x3**

**And please don't forget to review and give me feedback for my future stories! :)**


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